MUFFIN. SEBMOJO. YORUICHI. SITTING HERE.

You’re all such talented writers, aren’t you? You’re so clever with your pretty words and your big ideas, yes you are. You can wring the emotion out of a dry sponge with your fancy prose and your poignant plots, which is why I’ve got a very special challenge for you four.

Sometimes there's a man... I won't say a hero, ‘cause what's a hero? But sometimes, there's a man—but I’m not talking about the Dude. I am talking about a 90’s man, though. A very special type of 90’s man, one who oozes pure cool fuel.

You may not know him by his face, but you know him by his clothes. He’s got the slickest sunglasses you’ve ever seen, an all-around love for black, and that oh-so-special long coat that sets him apart from the lesser men who worship at his feet.

This is…



Your mission, should you choose to accept it (jk you already did) is to write a story with a bona-fide 90’s duster guy, the kind of badass motherfucker who can make a room fifty times cooler just by waltzing through the door. But that’s not all you have to do! You also—and here’s the sticking point—you also have to make me like this dude. And I don’t mean just by having him do cool shit, either, although he should be extremely cool. No, I want you four literary powerhouses to give this slick slate of a protagonist some honest-to-god emotion. Give him wants and needs that extend beyond kicking ass; give him doubts and flaws that make said ass-kickings harder. And do it all in 1800 words.

You have until February 13th at 11:59 PM PST to submit your stories to Chili, who will be posting them anonymously so I can read them all on Valentine’s Day. That’s right: this is my Valentine’s Day present to me, so you’d better warm my cold heart with a hot duster dude.